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OC Mary-Sue/Gary-Stu Test



This test is designed for Original Characters.  Questions for Role Play Characters and Fan Characters will be added soon.
Now, this tests for both the traditional Mary Sue/Gary Stu, and for 'gloomdog' style characters, which I suppose is a sub-category of the Mary Sue, but is often over-looked in this kind of test.

------------Instructions------------



Further down this test, there is a list of traits and characteristics, each one stating how many points that particular trait is worth.  Simply read through the list, and give your character the appropriate number of points for each of the listed traits/characteristics displayed by your character.
When you reach the end of the list, add up all of your character's points and refer to the results at the very bottom of the test to see (approximately) where your character is on the Sue Scale.

Now, while you're taking this test please also take into account the world/realm/reality your OC/FC lives in.  For example, if your character can fly, but they live in the real world, this would of course give them a point.  But if they live in a world where having a pet dragon is commonplace, do not give them a point.  Basically, just use your common sense.  If they are a Naruto Fan Character, don't give them a point for having special powers because that is common in the Naruto world, etc.

Also, I would like you to remember that none of these points on it's own makes your character a sue.  It is only when your character begins displaying lots of these traits that we are getting into Sue territory.

------------Examples and Advice------------



Let me just give you a few examples of some characters I made up on various points of the Sue-Scale.  This is mainly for new writers, or writers that are not as confident, or feel they need some guidance and advice to help them judge their character.  Experienced writers may want to skip this part.

Let's say we have a character called Jamie.  Jamie is 15 years old, and attends Secondary School.  His heart is in the right place, but he often loses his temper, resulting in many arguments and detentions.  As far as looks go he is fairly average, although unbeknown to him one of his classmates has a crush on him.  As well as being a schoolboy, he is also secretly part of an underground society of mages, due to the fact that his father is also a member.
His father cares about him a lot- sometimes too much- and his mother loves him too, although she does not know his and his father's secret.  He sometimes has a hard time balancing training as a mage and doing well in school, resulting in some tricky situations and escapades.


Okay, let's analyze this character.  Jamie in his personality is nicely balanced.  He is not too roguish, and not too perfect.  He isn't a girl-magnet either, which is a trap many new writers fall into (making their characters overly-attractive).  Now, he lives in an alternate version of the real world where magic exists, albeit only in secret.  Since he is one of a rare group, and gifted with a rare power, that would push him up the Sue Scale a bit, but he's still nowhere near being a Sue.  Another factor that stops him getting too many points over the whole magic thing is that he is not the ONLY mage, and he has a reasonable explanation as to why he is being trained as one (his father).  So overall, this character is fairly well balanced, he is not a Plain Jane, but he's not anywhere near being a Sue either, although it wouldn't take much more to push him up there.  One more point I feel I have to make is that there is a difference between 'Generic' and 'Mary Sue'  this Jamie character is generic and pretty unoriginal (mainly because I made him up on the spot) but he isn't a Sue.  A character can be generic without being a Sue, and a character can be a Sue without being Generic.

Our next character is called Olivia.  Olivia lives in the real world, with no 'added extras' (magic etc).  She is a student who has just moved out of home.  She lives with her two friends, and overall is doing fairly well at University, even though she is missing home.  In her personality, she is studious and kind.

Well, there isn't really much to say on this character, because there isn't really much to her as far as being good in a story goes.  She is what you'd call a 'Plain Jane', a character that although they are very plausible, probably won't provide much interest in a story.  (Although this is assuming she stays that way, and nothing major to change that happens).  But, you could could still do some good writing with her.  SInce she lives in a 'no added extras' real world, we can't have her develop magic powers, or uncover some supernatural talent.  But, with a reasonable amount of skill she could make a good character in a romance or crime story.  Just because she lives in the real world, doesn't mean her personality and views can't change throughout the story.
Remember, it's better to have a Plain Jane than a Mary Sue.

Our next character is called Valkyrie.  She lives in the real world, but she is beginning to develop magic powers.  She can read people's minds, and sometimes control what they do.  She thinks of these powers as a curse, and it scares her sometimes.  Both of her parents are dead, but it is later revealed that this is because they were demon-hunters, and Valkyrie's powers are because when demons came to kill her and her parents when she was only a toddler, the demons could not kill her her, instead she ended up taking some of their power.  This is because she is a special child, only one like her is born is born every 1000 years.  She is destined to bring down the demon world once and for all, but for now she is just struggling with school and having all the boys constantly checking out her perfect figure, which she hates because she thinks she is ugly.  In her personality she is kind, always helpful and excels at school, even though she thinks she isn't good enough.  She lives with her grandparents, who are very restrictive over her because they don't understand teens these days.

It pained me to write that.  Valkyrie is a blatantly obvious Sue, heck, just look at her name.  She has a strange out of place name, she has magic powers, her parents are dead, she is some sort of 'chosen one', she is very intelligent but doesn't think she is, she is very attractive but doesn't think she is, her grandparents are ever so cruel to her, and she has a heart of gold.  Look, if your character is anything like this, you're going to have a hard time toning them down.  I recommend starting again.

------------A Few More Tips------------



Here are just a few more tips that might help you avoid the dreaded Sue:

-Don't give them a really terrible past.  It's cliché, over-used and often used as an easy way out for justifying your character's personality and traits.
-Don't give them any kind of disorder such as bi-polar or OCD.  Of course it is possible to pull it off very well (such as the widely acclaimed book 'The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time' but I think it's a bit too difficult to pull off without being offensive and Sue-ish for a novice writer, it requires a great amount of skill, which hardly any young writers possess.  I'm generalising here, but I would say to just leave that one to the pros.
-Don't make them super-attractive, unless this is going to be used for a purpose other than simply having all the other characters fall in love with them.  It's better to leave this trait for supporting characters and comedy stories.
-Try not to self-insert.  For those who don't know what that is, a self-insert is a character that is either very much like the writer, or how the writer wishes they were.  If your character is a self-insert it's hard to make them balanced, as we tent to either look past or fail to see out own faults, and tend to get particularly defensive when our self-inserts are analyzed, as we feel like it is personal attack on us, not the character.

------------Without Further Ado...------------



FInally we get to the actual test.  It may not be wholly accurate, yada yada yada.  Don't flame me if your character scores as a Sue on this test etc.

The Test

Their name is unusual for their world/time/country (3 points)
...It's your name (1 point)
...It's a normal name, just spelled differently, such as 'Dayve' (1 point)
...It's a random name you just made up, such as Ulionaka (1 point)
..It has some special significance (1 point)
...They also have a really cool nickname (1 point)

Their eye colour is unusual for their world/time/country (2 points)
...This colour happens to be red (1 point)
...Their eyes change colour/have any other unusual traits (2 points)
...They have odd-coloured eyed (e.g one is blue one is brown) (1 point)
...They have a 'haunting' or 'powerful' gaze (2 points)
...They are outcast/discriminated against because of it (2 points)

Their hair/fur colour and/or style is unusual for their world/time/country (3 points)
...Their hair/fur changes colour (2 points)
...They are outcast/discriminated against because of it (2 points)

They are highly attractive to others (4 points)
...But they don't think they are as attractive as others claim (2 points)
...They look like you (1 point)
...They look how you wished you look (2 points)
...They look similar to a celebrity (1 point)
...They look similar to an anime/cartoon character (2 points)
...They have had children, yet still have a perfect figure (2 points)

They are currently in a relationship (2 points)
...Their lover has eyes only for them (2 points)
...Their lover is abusive (-2 points)
...Thier lover is a lover you would want yourself (2 points)

They dress according to a certain sterotype (Punk, Emo, etc) (3 points)
...They dress unusually/unacceptably for their setting (2 points)
...They dress how you dress (2 points)
...They dress how you wish you could get away with dressing (3 points)

They have a noticeable scar (1 point)
...That does not detract from their overall appearance (make them less attractive) (3 points)
...In fact, it makes them seem more 'cool' or 'badass' or 'mysterious' (3 points)
...The scar has left them disfigured/undesirable (-4 points)

(For girls only) They are thin, and yet still have a large bra size (unless they have implants) (3 points)
...They have fake breasts (-2 points)

They are very strong and/or muscular, yet never work out/have a bad diet (3 points)
...Their figure does not reflect their eating habits (e.g. All they eat is junk food, they they are still in great shape)(2 points)

They are disliked/hated by jealous people for their looks (4 points)

They are of a race/species that is discriminated against (2 points)
...They are a half-breed/mix (1 point)
...They are discriminated against because of this (2 points)
...They campaign against this discrimination (1 point)
...They eventually abolish this discrimination (3 points)
...They try to abolish this discrimination, but fail (-3 points)

They are a half-breed, and get the best of both sides (3 points)
...They are a half-breed and get the worst of both sides (-3 points)

They have animal ears and/or claws and/or a tail (ignore if you character IS an animal) (3 points)
...They only have cat/wolf/fox ears (3 points)
...They are some kind of mutant (2 points)

There are some kind of/partly some kind of mythical creature (e.g. Vampire, werewolf, elf etc.  Ignore if they live in a world where this is common, e.g. being an Elf in the Eragon universe) (4 points)
...And they consider this to be a curse (4 points)
...But they are immune to that creature's weaknesses (e.g. A vampire immune to garlic) (3 points)
...They were made into this creature by a lover (e.g. Bella Swan from Twilight) (4 points)

They can summon any kind of creature or object at will (2 points)
...They cannot control when said creature/object appears (-1 point)

They are possessed/inhabited/bonded to a supernatural being (e.g an angel or a demon.  Ignore if this is common, such as having a daemon in the Golden Compass universe) (4 points)
...This gives them special powers/abilities (3 points)
...They consider this a curse (3 points)
...The being gives them advice/protection (2 points)
...They willingly give up this being, even though they were benefiting from being joined with them (-3 points)

They have an unusual pet for their setting (3 points)
...This pet is a wolf/big cat/fox/bird of prey (3 points)

They have unusual/opposed opinions and ideas (2 points)
...They share the same views as you (2 points)
...They are discriminated against for these views (2 points)
...Their opinions are scientifically/morally 'correct' (e.g. A person living in the middle ages who believes the world is round, a rich white man in the 1700's who is opposed to slavery) (2 points)
...They eventually give in and change their views/abandon their ideas (-3 points)

They begin/inspire/lead some sort of revolution or uprising (4 points)
...The revolution/uprising is successful (2 points)
...They die in the process (3 points)
...The revolution/uprising is not successful (-3 points)

They can fly (2 points)
...They have wings (2 points)
...They can fly without wings (2 points)
...They fly using a machine they created/invented themselves (2 points)
...They cannot fly in a world where flying is common (-3 points)

They disrespect/dislike authority figures (2 points)
...Because they are just a rebellious character (2 points)
...Because of something that was done to them/a friend/a family member by said authority figure/s (2 points)
...They have good reason to dislike them (-1 point)
...They openly voice their opinions about said authority figure/s yet never get into trouble (3 points)
...They openly voice their opinions about said authority figures and are punished much more harshly than necessary/is usual (3 points)

One of their parents is dead (2 points)
...Both of their parents are dead (4 points)
...Their parents were murdered/their death was unjust (3 points)
...Your character is out to avenge their death/s (3 points)
...But they do not succeed in avenging them (-3 points)
...They never knew their parents (1 point)
...They don't know it, but they are actually royalty/heir to a fortune etc (4 points)

The people they live with/the people who look after them are unkind/irresponsible (3 points)
...The people/person who looks after them dislikes/hates them (2 points)
...This hate is unjustified/unfair (3 points)

In the past has your character...
...Been abused? (2 points)
...Neglected? (2 points)
...Bullied? (1 point)
...Tortured? (2 points)
...Abandoned? (2 points)
...Run away from home (without going back)?(2 points)
...Unjustly accused/punished for a crime/scandal? (2 points)
...Witnessed/caused the death of a family member/friend/lover (3 points)

Children and/or animals instinctively like them (3 points)
...Because of some power they possess (2 points)
...Because they are 'special' or ' chosen' (2 points)
...But your character dislikes children and/or animals (-3 points)

They are intelligent (2 points)
...They are top of their class/profession (2 points)
...They are very modest about it (1 point)
...Their intelligence makes them feel isolated (2 points)
...They are a genius/prodigy (3 points)
...They are disliked/hated by jealous people for their intelligence (2 points)
...They are an inventor (3 points)
...They make a groundbreaking new discovery (3 points)
...They are famous/well respected for their intelligence/work (2 points)
...They have a big ego/are a show-off about it (-3 points)
...You would describe them as a 'troubled genius' type (5 points)

They are the best as what they do (3 points)
...Even though they are young/fairly new to it (3 points)
...They learnt a new skill that normally takes a long time to master very quickly (3 points)
...They can beat the professionals at their own game (3 points)
...They are always very modest and don't accept compliments (1 point)
...They have a big ego/are a show off about it (-3 points)
...They had to work hard for many years to become the best at it (-2 points)

They can shapeshift (2 points)
...They can shapeshift into a wolf/big cat/bird of prey/fox/cat (2 points)
...Then can shapeshift into anything (3 points)
...Including inanimate objects (1 point)
...But they lose this power during the story (-3 points)</b>
...They cannot shapeshift but live in a world where it is common (-3 points)

They possess healing powers (2 points)
...These powers are strong enough to cure serious, life-threatening injuries/illnesses (3 points)
...They use these powers to save a lover/friend/family member/other important person from death (3 points)
...Although they possess these powers, they are unable to save a lover/friend/family member/other important person (-1 point)
</b>...They live in a world where healing powers are common but do not possess them themself (-3 points)

They are telekinetic/pyrokinetic/clairvoyant/have sixth sense etc (3 points)
...They are strong in this power (2 points)
...They use this power to protect save someone important (2 points)
...They live in a world where these powers are common, but do not possess them themself (-3 points)

They can communicate with the dead/otherworldy spirits/other supernatural beings (2 points)
...They consider this to be a curse (2 points)
...They communicate with a dead lover/family member/friend (3 points)
...They gain advice and insight from the spirits/beings (2 points)

Their power/s appeared suddenly at a critical moment (3 points)

They look younger than they really are (2 points)
...They never age (3 points)
...They are immortal (3 points)
...They look older than they really are (-3 points)
...They are aged between 10 and 18 (2 points)
...They are aged between 19-30 and look (1 points)
...They are aged between 31-50 and look their age (-1 point)
...They are aged over 50 and look their age (-2 points)
...They only look younger than they should because of plastic surgery (-3 points)

They have a disorder (such as bi-polar, split-personality, OCD, etc) (8 points)
...This is used to excuse much of their behaviour (5 points)
...This is used to try and gain sympathy for this character (5 points)
...They end up hurting a friend/relative/lover due to their disorder (5 points)

They have amnesia (can't remember their past) (4 points)
...They slowly begin to remember throughout the story (1 point)
...And they don't like what they remember (2 points)
...They remember that they did something terrible/something terrible happened (3 points)
...It takes one key event/person/place/etc an they remember everything (2 points)
...They never regain their memory, and never find anybody who can tell them what happened (-4 points)

They have a very good/photographic memory (3 points)
...and this does not serve any purpose in the plot (3 points)

They suffer from insomnia (2 points)
...although this does not affect their grades at school/performance at work (3 points)

They have a very bad phobia of something (2 points)
...This is due to some event in their past (3 points)
...They eventually get over it (1 point)
...It vanishes at a critical moment (3 points)
...It affects their everyday life and they never get over it (-3 points)

You would describe them as quirky, unique, different, weird, individual etc.  (4 points)
...They never follow the crowd (2 points)
...They reject all popular music, fashion etc (3 points)
...They have weird habits that are supposedly endearing (3 points)
...Some people think they're crazy (3 points)
...They are very 'individual' (3 points)

They are good at art (4 points)
...They paint (2 points)
...Their paintings/drawings/carvings etc are good enough to sell (3 points)
...They are very modest about their skill (2 points)
...You would describe them as a 'troubled artist' type (5 points)
...They are utterly hopeless at art (-1 point)
...They are a show-off (-1 point)
...They had to work hard for a long time to become good at art (-2 points)

They are good at music (4 points)
...They play a musical instrument to a high standard (2 points)
...They play more than one musical instrument to a high standard (Ignore if these are similar instruments such as a Trumpet and a Flugelhorn, or a Guitar and a Ukelele)(4 points)
...They play the flute, harp, drums, and/or the guitar (2 points)
...They sing in tune, with a nice voice (2 points)
...They are a virtuoso (4 points)
...They compose music/songs (2 points)
...These compositions are good enough to be published(4 points)
...They are very modest about their skill (2 points)
...They are a show off (-1 point)
...They had to work hard for a long time to become good at music (-2 points)

They are good at writing/poetry (4 points)
...They are writing/have written a novel (2 points)
...This novel is good enough to be published (4 points)
...They write poems (2 points)
...These poems are 'emotional' and 'deep' (3 points)
...These poems are good enough to be published (4 points)
...They are modest about their skill (2 points)
...They are a show off (-1 point)
...They had to work hard for a long time to become good at writing (-2 points)

(ignore these next few questions if your character does not attend school)
They are top of their class at school (2 points)
...Even though they do not try/work very hard (2 points)
...They are top of their class, but have to work hard to get/stay there (-2 points)
...They could be top of their class, but don't try art school (-1 point)
...They do badly at school (-2 points)
...Even though they try (-2 points)

(ignore these next few questions of your character does not have a job)
They have an exciting and/or unusual job (2 points)
...They have a job you wish you had (2 points)
...They hate their job (-3 points)
...They did not willingly choose their job (-2 points)

They have a curse upon them (3 points)
...They never manage to break the curse (-3 points)

They are part of a prophecy (3 points)
...They are central to said prophecy (4 points)
...They never fulfill the prophecy (-2 points)

They were born on an important date (e.g. The Summer Solstice, New Year's Eve etc) (3 points)
...This has significance in the story (2 points)

They have a sibling from whom they were separated at birth (2 points)
...This sibling is an identical twin (3 points)
...This sibling was separated for a reason (2 points)

They have a 'special' or 'different' type of soul (3 points)
...They have the wrong body for their (e.g. A human with an animal soul) (3 points)

Their parents/guardians are very restrictive (2 points)
...For no apparent reason (2 points)
...Because they have outdated views/do not 'understand' your character (3 points)

They are 'random' and/or 'hyper' (5 points)

They smoke/chew tobacco (-1 point)
...And never break the habit (-2 points)
...But never get any of the bad health affects such as yellow teeth and fingers, emphysema and cancer (3 points)
...They do get these bad side effects (yellow teeth, cancer etc) (-3 points)

They are an alcoholic (-2 points)
...They spend more than they can afford on alcohol (-2 points)
...Their habits drive away their relatives and friends (-3 points)
...And they suffer the ill-health affects associated with excessive drinking (-2 points)
...Depsite their alcoholism, they do not lose any friends or suffer side-affects (4 points)

They are overweight (not just a little bit chubby, I mean properly overweight)(-2 points)
They are obese (-4 points)
They stay overweight/obese throughout the whole story (-3 points)

They are addicted to either legal or illegal drugs, or solvents (-3 points)
...They spend more than they can afford on these drugs (-2 points)
...They lose friends and estrange relatives because of their habits (-3 points)
...They suffer the side effects of these drugs (-3 points)
...They remain addicted throughout the story (-2 points)
...Even though they are addicted to these drugs, they don't lose any friends or suffer side-effects (4 points)

They are irritable, grumpy and have a short temper, and remain this way throughout the story (-3 points)

They are a bully (-2 points)

They are emotionless (-2 points)


------------Results------------




30 or Less- In the Clear
If your character scored here, then well done!  Your character is most likely well-balanced, and believable.  If your character is scoring in the upper end of this category you may want to just adjust and tone down a few aspects, but overall it should be fine.  Don't worry about your character scoring too low; there's nothing wrong with that.

31-41- Borderline Sue
If your character is scoring around here, you've got some work to do.  Your character is getting into Sue territory here, so I would advise a critical look at your character, asking yourself if each trait they have is really necessary, and looking for places where you can tone them down.  But they're not a hopeless case, and with a good amount of critical analysis and toning down, they should be ok.

42 or More- Mary Sue
Now, there are varying degrees of Sue above this, but the fact that your character has fallen into the category is the main issue.  Of course to get a good, believable and interesting character you have a long way to go.  Depending on how far gone your character is, they may not even be recognisable as their former self when you have worked on them sufficiently.  My advice would be to take good, very harsh look at your character.  Get rid of and re-do as many things as you can without ruining the plot, and then re-take the test and see where they fall.  If they are still classed as a Mary Sue or as a Borderline Sue, you may also want to reconsider your plotline and the world that they live in.  Failing that approach too, I would just start again.

Some example Scores:

Bella Swan (From Twilight)- 48
Naruto Uzumaki (From Naruto)- 45
Harry Potter (From Harry Potter)- 43
Katniss Everdeen (From The Hunger Games)- 26
Eragon Bromsson (From Eragon)- 30

------------Some Final Words of Advice------------



Now, here is just one major flaw I fell I should point out that applies to pretty much all Mary Sue tests, not just my own- remember how you were supposed to ignore a question such as 'they can fly' if your character lives in a world where flying is common?  Well, just listen to this scenario.  Let's say we have a character who can fly without wings, but has wings anyway, has colour changing eyes, colour changing hair, si connected to an angel and a demon at the same time, has three pet dragons and it telekinetic, pyrokinetic, clairvoyant and a dream walker.  Sounds ridiculous right?  Well, technically this character could fall into the 'balanced character' or even 'Plain Jane' category on this test, and they could also score low on any other Sue Test, because everyone in their world can fly without wings but has wings anyway and has colour changing eyes etc etc etc. You see how it could happen?  Well, this is why I ask you before you go to just think about that.  Of course it is a very exaggerated example, but it could still easily happen.  Your character may score as a Balanced Character, yet still be ridiculous and unbelievable.  That is the difficulty with Mary Sue tests like this; although they can provide a good measure and give advice, they just don't beat a good critical analysis by a human being.  

So if you are still unsure of your character after taking this test, or would like any further advice, either leave a comment here telling me about your character, or note me telling me about them, and I will give you a fair, honest critique of them, and some advice, for free.



Thank for taking to time to read and use this test, yours sincerely, Snowy.
29/12/11 Edit: I have given this test a major overhaul. It's nothing like what it used to be. I originally created this a long time ago, and I was beginning to feel that I really could do better now, so I did. I hope this test is now much more useful to you all :)
And yes, I will be doing another edit soon that includes questions specifically for Fan Characters and Role Play characters.

Hello there, and thank you for taking my test! I much appreciate all of the support and feedback etc!
Now, here's the token disclaimer:

I am not, or do I claim to be an expert on this subject. Do not think the results you get from this test are set in stone, or 100% accurate. This test is merely a guide, and my advice is simply that- my advice. They are not the golden rules of writing, and you should not treat them as such. For the most accurate guidance and results, I recommend you take more than one test for your character- there are other great tests here on devART, and elsewhere on the web.

Now that that's over with, I would just like to remind you that yes, I do free critiques and give free advice. Of course I'm not an expert, but I do a heck of a lot of reading (since I was 6, I've probably read over 500 books) so I am experienced with literature of varying forms; I'm not completely clueless ;)
Anyway, with my critiques I'll make an effort to be fair and keep my harshness at a minimum. I understand how discouraging it can be to a writer if their characters are passed off as being rubbish, or boring, or whatever else.
So without further ado, good bye~

Have I forgotten something? Could this test be improved? Please inform and I will edit it, giving you credit of course :)

Thanks to BlackCat79779, MisterEnigma58
For the advice you have given me! I'll add your name here too if you give me some good feedback on this test :)
Add a Comment:
 
:iconautumnique:
Autumnique Featured By Owner Edited 21 hours ago
I got 7 *0*
Reply
:iconnaipherah:
NaiPherah Featured By Owner May 12, 2016  New Deviant Hobbyist Traditional Artist
My character got a 22, so I hope that means he is pretty balanced. Wouldn't want him to be to much, or to little ☺️
Reply
:iconajthedragon:
AjTheDragon Featured By Owner May 11, 2016  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I got a -2 thanks to my character's obsession with alcohol!
Reply
:iconpokemonsonicgirl123:
pokemonsonicgirl123 Featured By Owner May 10, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
43.5? ...So my OC who's heavily and primarily influenced by Ben 10 with a bunch of Mobian companions and a trinket that gives her eleven magical girl forms a Mary-Sue? Either I did the test wrong or a few of these have two or three points too many.
Reply
:iconnialovespie:
NiaLovesPie Featured By Owner Edited Apr 15, 2016
Yay I only got a six! (She's an UTAU)
Reply
:icontomboyjanet:
TomboyJanet Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2016  Student General Artist
And what of the oppression thing? In my fantasy stories I'm working on, practically every race is oppressed in some way and all claim they are more so than the others. It's really hard to judge that question in the world of Amaghast, becuase the oppressed also often become oppressors such as the Amazonian womans revolt that lead to the torture of men.
Reply
:icontomboyjanet:
TomboyJanet Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2016  Student General Artist
I noticed some contradictions, like "Is abused in the past" makes them more mary sue but "in abusive relationship" makes them less.

I would complain more but lots of stuff at the end smacked the mary sue points right out of my character.

I wonder though if an alien being belonging to a race of telepaths being born without the ability to properly utilize it due to a bent antenna would knock it down for that. Probably would be the same as not being able to fly in a world of fliers right?
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:icongabers100:
Gabers100 Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2016
I got a twelve. Hows that for great?
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:iconpfutziie:
pfutziie Featured By Owner Mar 25, 2016
I think you shouldn't put the mental disorders things there. It's actually kind of stupid i mean, mary sues are perfect edgy characters, and mental disorders are edgy too but... 8 points is TOO MUCH!! If the oc has good reason for having a back story that is tragic and if they have a good reason for that mental disorder.. i think it should be like -3, or something.
Even my character is possessed by a demon, has a bipolar personality, and is really strong even if she is small and thin.. i got 15. :'D I'm suprised
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:iconkimikosaphire:
KimikoSaphire Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
My Pokemon oc got 13 and my My Little Pony oc got 39.
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:iconultimatestarwarrior1:
UltimateStarWarrior1 Featured By Owner Mar 3, 2016  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Kyle: I GOT A 28! WOOHOO! YEAH!

Tyler: You do realize that's 3 numbers below the Borderline Sue system, right?

Kyle: The author has to work on me a little..
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:iconultimatestarwarrior1:
UltimateStarWarrior1 Featured By Owner Mar 4, 2016  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Tyler: I got a 13.

Kyle: FUUUUUUUUUUUUU
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:iconultimatestarwarrior1:
UltimateStarWarrior1 Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2016  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
James: Hey guys!

Kyle and Tyler: WAT

James: I got a 3! Best day of my life!

Kyle and Tyler: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
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:iconinuzupunupi:
inuzupunupi Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2016
maybe not sues, but still boring
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:iconultimatestarwarrior1:
UltimateStarWarrior1 Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2016  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
So... 3 is basically boring?
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:iconasklegionofawesome:
AskLegionOfAwesome Featured By Owner Feb 29, 2016  Hobbyist Artist
Audre: And this time I got a 14 instead of 6. Not bad considering the scoring system.
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:iconangels-end:
Angels-End Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2016  Student Traditional Artist
Hahahaha! My OC got 65 XD
But honestly I can't see her as a Mary Sue, go ahead and call me a bad writer if you want, but she has her own problems and she's well-developed. She has no powers of anything like that, mostly got all of those points because of the things she has to do to hide a rebellion... And dead parents... She lives in a utopian world, though, so that attributes to a lot of that, pff XD
*Is probably going to regret posting this later, lol*
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:iconinuzupunupi:
inuzupunupi Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2016
well yeah... that IS a mary sue, lol.
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:iconaskmimithemareep:
AskMimiTheMareep Featured By Owner Edited Feb 5, 2016  Hobbyist Digital Artist
My Hunger Games OC got 5.My Dork Dance Frog Emoji-58 (Yay) [V3] 
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:icontimewap1:
Timewap1 Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2016
Now I could've sworn I've commented on this...
Well in any case...

Traits are a victim of circumstance.
This whole "Mary Sue" thing is really just a misnomer for what the actual problem you may have encounter.

Bad writing.

"There is no such thing as bad characters, only bad writers". - Me

People do these knee jerk reaction lists because they have been exposed to too many badly writing writers writing badly.
And all this does is promote a toxic environment for novice and good writers alike by sending a message that taking chances and failures are to be scorn. Which is bad because you need to actually do this in order to improve your skills and identify your weaknesses and strengths.

Here. Take some better advice which should give you more of a better understanding for character development. Based on personal observations which is purely meant to be objective as possible.

timewap1.deviantart.com/journa…

The most important thing to understand in creating a character is WHY. Not what, how when and where but why is this character here.
And when you understand that only then can you expand your possibilities with your skills.

You're welcome :)
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:iconpikaapplechan:
Pikaapplechan Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
If the trait is used only for comedy (i.e. the eating thing), does it still count?
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:iconzanthor-the-great-dg:
Zanthor-the-Great-DG Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
I would say not. If you make it a point to say that they eat nothing but junk food and never gains any weight, that's something that would count towards your character being a Mary Sue. If, however, they eat seven times their body mass in food at a dinner within seconds for comedic purposes, I would say not to add points for that. Just remember not to overuse jokes and you'll be fine.
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:iconpikaapplechan:
Pikaapplechan Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
Okay. Thanks~!
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:iconbubblekirby:
bubblekirby Featured By Owner Jan 8, 2016
I got 32. Looks like I have some work to do...
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:iconfroeken-ert:
froeken-ert Featured By Owner Dec 7, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
... -20, is that supposed to be possible? Disfigured, a smoker and drug addict (eventually overdosing). Poor baby.
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:iconpoptropigirl:
poptropigirl Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2015  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
...I got 88 XD Then again, it WAS on my Poptropica character XD
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:iconcoolchao135-nichelle:
Coolchao135-Nichelle Featured By Owner Nov 25, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
I don't understand why disorders give the character Mary Sue points... I get it if these disorders don't have an effect and things like that, but just an ordinary disorder that completely messes things up? 
I just don't get it.
What was the point add-up for a disorder? 8? I'm too lazy to look back or remember.
But that's just a disorder, nothing overpowered about it :/
I'm sorry, I'm just curious.
Don't hurt me.
This IS the Internet after all...
*le shrug*
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:iconmultisora101:
multisora101 Featured By Owner Oct 29, 2015  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I got 29 ^^; though admittedly my character IS a goddess (not right off the bat, she had a lot of trial and error, not to mention is pitted against her also immortal sister for eternity because of her kinda twisted mom) but she's not a main character <_< she would appear more towards the end...
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:iconbiobreach:
BioBreach Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Can you make this for animal OC's? Because I could only answer about 3 of the questions because my OC is a dog.. Also please add a part for depression, example: Is depressed (+2), their depression is reflected off of the OC's creator (-1 point), the character cuts/self harms (+1 point), the character is bullied for no apparent reason (+2), the character is bullied because of their looks (-3) and etc.
PLEASE consider an animal OC test.
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:icongoldbirdprincess155:
GoldBirdPrincess155 Featured By Owner Oct 12, 2015  Student Digital Artist
I love it! My character got 12 points!
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:iconpicnicel:
Picnicel Featured By Owner Oct 3, 2015
I got 20 : D
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:iconawesomesauceomness:
Awesomesauceomness Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2015
I didn't know one of my O.Cs would be THAT much of a Sue! 54
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:iconlittleditto94:
littleditto94 Featured By Owner Sep 15, 2015
wow, I thought my character was a bit more sue-ish. she didn't even get to twenty even before I subtracted stuff. cool.
this did help me realize another character was getting toward borderline. I've reviewed her abilities and had her get new abilities much slower. Originally she started out with four abilities and gained a new one each arc, but now she's gonna start out with two and get one new one each arc.
thanks for the help :)
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:iconawesomesauceomness:
26. I thought she would get less...
This is only for one of my characters.
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:iconspikethestalker:
SpikeTheStalker Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2015
Ah, there are so many things about him that are not on the list. Though, I will add the things that are on the list first. xD
His name is unusual for their world/time/country
has some special significance (1 point) 
He truly has no name... He has no name because he was taken away from his parents for his testing before they had time to name him. He is a fighter in his group therefore, they call him "Commander"... I think it would be pretty awkward being called "Nameless" everywhere you go. xD
His eye color is unusual for their world/time/country
This colour happens to be red (1 point)

his hair/fur colour and/or style is unusual for their world/time/country
...They are outcast/discriminated against because of it (2 points) This is kind of true. His odd coloring makes him less attractive to others. All the others are black, brown, grey, white, while he is purple.

He has a noticeable scar
...The scar has left them disfigured/undesirable (-4 points) I think I forgot to add it in his picture, although his has a slash across his eye, that blinded one of his eyes. three small slashes across his face and one torn ear. (Yes, he has ears, he is a wolf/ furry thing.)

One of his parents is dead (2 points) He was taken away by humans for testing. His mother thought they would bring her child back, although they did not, therefore, she jumped off a cliff and committed suicide.


He is are some kind of mutant (2 points) Yea, he used to be a normal black wolf, until he was taken to a lab to change him. They changed him in a attempt to make a powerful, military soldier that was not human, because they did not want to give up any more human lives.They changed his fur and eye color to make him look different from his species. His paws were turned into metal hands/graspers so he could grab things. His legs were slightly changed so he could stand on his twos and fours as he wished. His brain was changed into a human brain, although his memory from his old brain was transported to the new one. They did this to give him human intelligence.

He disrespects/dislikes authority figures
...They have good reason to dislike them (-1 point) He dislikes most humans, most authority figures are humans. Humans were the ones that took him away and changed his life.

In the past has your character...
...Tortured? (2 points?) I am not completely sure about this. Yes, his form was completely changed and his brain and hands were replaced, although, he was put to sleep while they did it. Though, at the same time he had lots of shots and was kept in a cell for 10 years, until he escaped while he was being used in a battle.


They have a very bad phobia of something
...It affects their everyday life and they never get over it (-3 points) He has a fear of swimming. (Hydrophobia)


This sibling was separated for a reason (2 points) Once again, he was separated from his family by the humans.


They smoke/chew tobacco (-1 point) He does not smoke much, although he does it on occasion. He has yellowed teeth because of it.

If you want to hear more about him, you can read the description in his reference sheet. There are some things that I missed in the description that are mentioned in my post.


This character is my second oc and his score is: 3 It's not that bad, is it? D:
There are alot of things about him that I did not mention here that may up his score. XD

This is kind of what he looks like, although, I did forget some things in the picture, I forgot his scars and blinded eye. spikethestalker.deviantart.com…
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:iconkevintheradioguy:
kevintheradioguy Featured By Owner Aug 29, 2015  Professional Artist
One.
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:iconinterestingpotato:
Interestingpotato Featured By Owner Edited Aug 12, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
20! But I had to add things for weird hair and eye color because he's albino, and I had to add eight because he has social anxiety disorder that cripples him. Should I have added those things? I'm still confused on weather having social anxiety that he can't get over is a Mary sueish trait or not. And is being albino a Mary sueish trait? It's not like he was born an albino to fulfill a prophesy or something, he's just albino because genetics.
(Edit) p.s. Being albino downs his attractiveness level, and he did get bullied for this.
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:iconthewhirlwindmaster:
Thewhirlwindmaster Featured By Owner Aug 4, 2015
21, 26 if you include her energy when she's excited/happy. 
They are highly attractive to others (4)  (This is a trait of her species, and makes them rather deceiving)
They are currently in a relationship. (Kinda?) (2) (Not currently in a relationship, but will be in the future. Does this count?)
They are of a race/ species that is discriminated against (2) (She's a vampire)
They are a half-Breed/mix (1) (mostly part bat)
They can fly (2)(Part bat)
They have wings(2) (Again, part bat)
One of their parents is dead (2) (Her mother, killed when she was young by her father)
The people who look after them are unkind (3) (Normal for her species though)
Has been abused (2) (By father. Also common for her species)
Witnessed the death of a family member/friend/lover (3) (If she lost all three, does that mean she gets 9 points for this?)
They can shapeshift (2)(Into a bat)
They are aged between 19-30 and look (1)(What do you mean by look? Look like they're their age?)
They are utterly hopeless at art (-1) (She hasn't figured out how to properly hold a pencil yet. She'll get there)
They do badly at school (-2) (Mostly because she'd rather eat her classmates than study and the before mentioned unable to hold a pencil)

 
Its a good enough test, though I don't really know if some of the things I put down here are relevant considering there's a reason for most of them. 
i c something about character critques. I need critques :C
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:icononthebench26:
onthebench26 Featured By Owner Aug 3, 2015  Student General Artist
I get 19! Thumbs Up Naruto Uzumaki (Thumbs Up) 
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:iconbeetlebite:
beetlebite Featured By Owner Jul 26, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist

oh jesus, one of my characters got -2
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:iconmyworldisaplayground:
MyWorldIsAPlayground Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2015  Student General Artist
28! In the clear! Aw man I was at like 36, and then bad habits came in and I was like gurl- yes. Regardless, back to the drawing boards to do some reconstructing anyway!
 Run Computer addict. Haruhi Suzumiya Emote - Thumbs Up 
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:iconsexualnugget:
SexualNugget Featured By Owner Jul 17, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
HOOHOO 29
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:iconspider-lock:
Spider-Lock Featured By Owner Edited Jul 17, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
i got 12 on my character Noir: fav.me/d91l64p but i'm not sure about her. her backstory was that she lived in a happy world, nice and perfect until one day her parents died in a car crash. now that sounds mary sue-ish, but her parents came back (after her being depressed all the time because of her parents death) to see her, with her mom being a ghost and her dad being a skeleton. they visit her every year or so.

i would describe her to be Curious, sort of Depressed, Nice, Mysterious, and a bit Shy.(she also loves mysteries, sadness, darkness and gloom. but doesn't want anyone else but her to experience it) please give me some critique about her. i'll try to fix her the best i can. she feels a bit mary sue-ish :( (Sad) 
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:iconmasterperrymartin:
MasterPerryMartin Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2015
Absolute horseshit. Every part of it. You listed having phobias as being mary-suish. HOW? Surely having a phobia is a weakness and having a weakness stops you from being perfect? Surely it debilitates you in some manner? And what about mental problems? How the fuck can you be "perfect" if you have something like Bi-Polar or Schizophrenia?

I managed to get 34 on this "test", but it SHOULD be lower were it not for some idiotic loopholes. Though frankly, why I put some trust in someone who clearly states he doesn't know that much on the subject is beyond me. Maybe because I wanted to see what constituted a "mary-sue" for others after a good 5 years of parody-sues clogging up my inbox. And weaknesses make you "perfect", apparently. Fuck this test!
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:iconscreaming-rok:
screaming-rok Featured By Owner Sep 8, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
Many aspects were also not included, such as if it were natural in the world they live in, or if it was caused by real events happening to them. I believe this test was just to list the traits of a mary-sue and not to actually determine if it were a sue or not.
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:iconscreaming-rok:
screaming-rok Featured By Owner Sep 8, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
I think the Bi-Polar and Schizophrenia come in only when you start having an edgy character. Having a mental disorder due to trauma is fine, it's not sue at all, however, being born with it or just having it for no reason at all would transcend into the sue-ishness. Since many people like to give their characters mental disorders for no good reason, it's become so commonplace along with tragic pasts and blood. Lot's of blood.

But let's say, this disorder affects them in the way it's meant to - that means no odd behaviour that cannot be explained by their disorder - and also has an explanation for being there instead of simply being plopped down - now that wouldn't make a sue. The test is most likely subjective and the best way to get input would be to ask people what they think and for honest critique.

Now on to phobias. Phobias must have an IC reason too, because they can't just manifest suddenly. For example, a fear of the dark. If they were just scared of it for no apparent reason, it wouldn't make sense. Was it cultivated from childhood? Did something happen to them in adulthood that would have induced this fear? Logical and explainable reasoning won't make it a sue. 

It doesn't make you perfect, or a sue, but it must have an IC explanation. I think that's the whole point of it - have a logical IC explanation for your character's quirks and it will be fine.
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:iconamorousdeath:
AmorousDeath Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2015
I got 19. 
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:iconnichy27:
Nichy27 Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2015
Got 35. I suppose I deserve it for making an ex-villain who's pretty much a Gray Jedi Jack Sparrow.
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:iconchookie2000:
chookie2000 Featured By Owner Jun 7, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
These tests scare me because I have an OC that I love that it "Mary Sue"-ish even thought she has THOUSANDS of flaws. The true Mary Sue was her mother, who is actually dead.
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